‘Restore your Virginity?’
The Illusion of Virginity and Hymen Repair in Sri Lanka
Maya aimlessly scrolls through her social media. A month left for her much-anticipated wedding, her home feed bursts with pictures of brides head-to-toe in white. Suddenly, she stumbles on an advertisement that says: ‘Do you want to restore your virginity?’
She pauses. She recalls the hints she received from her family about her wedding night. “We better get the white bedsheets ready,” her aunt had quipped. Maya clicks the link and descends into a world of hymen repair kits and pills.
A woman’s virginity is a status of ‘purity’ coveted by many in society. ‘True virginity’ is believed to be proven by an ‘intact hymen’. We still have archaic traditions of inspecting white bedsheets to test a woman’s virginity. In this context, advertisements have recently begun to market methods to circumvent these ‘virginity tests’.
Hymen repair kits and pills are temporary methods that promise the opportunity to ‘regain’ or ‘repair’ one’s virginity. These products clearly, and cleverly commercialise societal beliefs.
Maya’s research spans several hours. She first discovers the difference between ‘virginity testing’, ‘hymen repair’, and hymen reconstruction surgery. Virginity testing involves the examination of virginity post-intercourse. By contrast, hymen repair is meant to create the illusion of blood from a broken hymen, thereby ‘confirming virginity’. Meanwhile, hymen reconstruction surgery is a temporary surgical restoration of the hymen. The repair kits and pills are promoted widely online, particularly for their convenience, as they do not require a visit to a clinic. Maya finds stories of other girls and women, just like her, who have considered these options usually for cultural reasons. Some are afraid to marry because they have not had the chance to talk about sex with their partner. Others are pressured by their families to maintain the façade of being a virgin. For many, there is an overall fear that they will be considered ‘unworthy’ or ‘impure’ if found out.
Maya even comes across a step-by-step guide to using these products. The hymen repair kit or the hymen repair pill is to be inserted hours before intercourse. The product will then rupture and mimic the process of bleeding. While the process itself seems harmless enough, Maya feels uncomfortable as she reads more about the product. The product’s slogans capitalise on society’s obsession with virginity. The social media captions use taglines such as ‘a chance to gain your virginity back’, ‘The only thing that will save your wedding night and avoid embarrassment for you and your family?’ and ‘enabling her to be a virgin again!’. The advertisements she read make her feel guilty about her previous sexual activities, however safe and consensual they were. She realises that the messaging is quite perfect for a market such as Sri Lanka: teeming with people ashamed to talk about sex, and with barely any sex education. These advertisements also misrepresent information about the hymen and give the impression that an intact hymen is confirmation of ‘virginity’.
Studies have shown that for some women the hymen does not develop at all. The hymen can also break for reasons other than sexual intercourse, such as intense physical activity and sport. Much like the appendix, there is no accepted medical reason for the hymen’s existence. However, society has created an added role for the hymen, a destiny of sorts — to be the protector and keeper of this concept called ‘virginity’. It is this constructed value that allows businesses that produce and supply items such as ‘hymen repair kits’, to exist.
Globally, there have been calls to ban the advertising of hymen repair kits on online marketplaces such as Amazon and eBay. Within Sri Lanka too, articles have criticised hymen reconstruction surgery and the preoccupation with virginity. The businesses that offer hymen repair seem predatory. They exploit the illusion that virginity is ‘sacred’ or that it can be ‘measured’ by a broken hymen.
For Maya, such predatory advertising of hymen repair kits reminds her of advertisements on fairness promoting products. The idea of being fair holds no actual value. It is society that has placed an importance on fairness, which in turn has allowed for an industry of fairness cosmetics to thrive. For years Sri Lankan girls have grown up wishing they could paint themselves lighter browns, or even better yet, a milky white. Similar to the class-based and colonial roots of fair skin obsession, hymen repair relies on cultural and patriarchal notions of women and their role in society.
According to a Sri Lankan retailer of the product, customers of this product range from girls, women, parents, and boys (sometimes claiming to be ex-boyfriends) to even doctors. “Each person has the right to their life,” the retailer stated, adding that this product holds value to many customers who feel that this is their only option. “It is the purchaser’s choice and we cannot change this,” the retailer added.
It is society that has placed an importance on ‘being a virgin’, and hymen repair is a by-product of this notion. Many women choose to repair their hymens not just to protect themselves culturally, but also for psychological and emotional reasons following sexual violence. Hymen repair kits and pills seem to offer women a choice. Yet, products of this nature continue to control their bodies and sexuality. They reinforce the idea that women need to be ‘pure’ until marriage, and offer a quick fix for the lack of sex education and open communication in a society.
Maya finally stops researching. Her thoughts are muddled: about virginity, the hymen, and her upcoming nuptials.
The belief that virginity is necessary and that it must be verified is a harmful myth. Businesses that profit from this belief are active participants in a cycle that will not allow society to rethink its value on virginity and the hymen. Importantly, it reminds us that women and girls are still to gain complete bodily autonomy.
(Maya is a fictional character developed for the purposes of narrating the story. However, the advertisements on hymen repair kits and pills are very real.)
First published on The Sunday Morning (page 32).
